Archive for September, 2010


Be smart. Stay in. Save cash. Make your own fun.
September 13th, 2010 | 1 Comment

We’ve already talked about which products your partner steals from you—and which you should steal from them. Now we’re here with an updated list of products you should use together. Be smart. Stay in. Save cash. Make your own fun–

Step One: Get Groovin’. Swing by your local independent music store (these guys are suffering, folks) and buy some mellow jazz on an indie label (these guys have never not suffered).  We’ve already turned you on to  Bennie Maupin’s “Early Reflections”.  Now we want to share with you our all-time-fave-forever-sexy-jazz-great,  Chet Baker.  Check out his music and  if that doesn’t get you in the mood, nothing will. See Indie Jazz for other ideas. Press play and move onto–

STEP TWO: Get Dirty. Yes, we do mean dirty. You can spring for pricy love potions, but you’re paying for the sexy marketing. For half the price, we’re fans of  Now, Almond Body Oil, found at any health food store. Then again, a truly frugal bitch will make her own massage oil with canola and essential oils (if you’ve got any good recipes, send ‘em our way). We trust you know what to do with the stuff. Follow with—

STEP THREE: Get clean. Hop in the shower. For a delicious splurge, you won’t regret Weleda’s, Birch Body Scrub, (ahem, leave the thrashing branches behind.) Or for half the price, opt for the oldie, but goodie, Neutrogena Sugar Scrub Body Exfoliator. Or be a real bitch on a budget and make your own: mix equal parts brown sugar and granulated white sugar, squirt in some of your almond oil, and add powdered cinnamon, nutmeg, and ginger to your liking. A tasty treat –

Send us your home recipes!






Duck, Duck, Cheap Cheat, Duck, Goose
September 10th, 2010 | Comments

How often do you cook duck? We bet the answers around the circle are: Never. Never. Not often. Never. Wait! Don’t feel bad. For most of us, duck usually falls into the ‘order in a restaurant because it’s a pain in the ass to make at home’ category of meal.

That’s all about to change because we’re going to share our easy and incredibly tasty recipe for duck legs. Best of all, for us B’s on a budget, we’ve been buying them for less than $2 bucks each at our local market and serving them at our fanciest dinner parties.

Start by setting a killer table (hey, you’re cheaping out on the ingredients), find a super bottle of Beaujolais, slow roast turnips or potatoes, grill or roast peaches, and make our favorite green salad.

This recipe is so cheap and so easy you’ll feel like you’re cheating.

The B’s Faking-It Duck Confit*

Set oven at 225 degrees. Wash and dry legs.  Salt and pepper generously. Make a spice mix using the following ingredients (add your own favorites or subtract the ones that make your teeth chatter):

-1/4 tsp. Cinnamon

-1/4 tsp  Ground Cloves

-1 tsp.     Allspice

-1/4 tsp  Curry

-1/2 tsp  Cumin

-1/4 tsp  Five Spice Powder (optional)

Generously season the duck legs on both sides. Place in a skillet in the oven and cook 4-6 hours, turning once. (Truth be told, we’ve let the little suckers go all day without turning and they’ve been terrific.) The skin should be crispy and the meat falling off the bone tender.

The B’s Simple Salad


1 Head Bibb or Boston Lettuce washed and broken into small pieces

-3 tbslp extra virgin olive oil

-1  tbslp aged sherry vinegar

-1 tsp minced shallots

-1/2 tsp Dijon Mustard

-salt (to taste–we like lots!)

-pepper

Mix dressing ingredients until emulsified.

(*Not our duck–but you get the drift)






Cheap fixes for those no-good, very bad days.
September 8th, 2010 | 1 Comment

We’ve been thinking about just what it is that can transform a sucko miserable day into something better. You know, the bus driver slammed the door in your face in the pouring rain; a defective lid caused coffee to drip all over your new Anne Fontaine white shirt; then, while you’re wet and coffee stained, your boss announces that the Excel spreadsheet you pulled the all-nighter working on had the wrong assumptions. What fixes such a terrible, horrible, no-good,very bad day?

For us it’s flowers. Yup. We’re simple bitches and a single red anemone makes everything seem brighter. (Ok, not everything, but for a minor-minute we’re happier.)

For our friend Janey it’s hunting for a new pair of bargain priced designer  shoes. Lexie goes ga-ga for a manicure. Linda loves her chocolate ice cream.

We’re wondering what cheap fixes do you have for a no-good, very bad day?

.






Home Decorating and Horny
September 7th, 2010 | Comments


For those of you who have read ‘The Bitches’ you know we lust after bold, sexy, big…

Superordinate Antler Pendant

…chandeliers.

While we’re infatuated with enormous antler-inspired light fixtures, we can’t have them. They’re way too big for our space, too pricy for our budget and would require an entire home makeover to fit in.

Sooo…

…we went on the hunt for substitutes because we believe that little things, when used correctly, can still keep a girl satisfied. We’ve found an array of faux horny things sure to please:


While not illuminating this cardboard head is dear to us.


Cardboard Safari


This wall mounted coat hanger is a complete turn-on.

Ballard Designs, (one of our go to catalogs for good looking home accents), is selling a knockout collection by Susan Kasler.

Of course, a gal on a budget could brave the woods* and collect her own trophies.  After all, those big bucks freely shed their wares.

*(Just make sure the woods you pick allow you to legally collect shed antlers.)






Madewell? Maybe. Madechic. No.
September 6th, 2010 | Comments

Only on occasion are we overly bitchy — no, not cranky lunar crabby, more like catty junior high snarly. You know, commenting on the girl wearing green leggings and puffy sleeves who looks like a cross between an elf and the Jolly Green Giant kind of mean.

To be honest, if this had not come into our inbox from the usually trend-right Madewell under the headline “Our Latest Obsession,” we would not be going out of our way to comment. But it was like a personal violation of bad taste after we had trusted them with our e-mail address.

The copy reads: “Slouch Sweatpants. An utterly irresistible (and totally chic) hybrid of sweatpants and cargos — expect to live in them.”

2010-08-10-slouch.jpg

We know that not every garment from design to manufacture is a winner, but to select these (Sweatpants? Cargos? Swargos?) as an e-mail card is, well, just not Madesmart.

We originally published this article in the Huffington Post 8/9/2010






A Clothing Diet? Not for this B* on a Budget
September 4th, 2010 | Comments

Some things in life are sacred, so we usually make it a rule to avoid mixing religion, politics and fashion. Full burqas, nun habits and total hipster head to toe black uniforms are all equally colorless. We thank the fashion gods that the cold war is over rendering the grey Soviet bloc look and the ubiquitous Mao jacket relics of the past. In fact, is not Michelle Obama on Vanity Fair’s best-dressed list proof positive that we are not a socialist state?

So, all the talk lately about going on a ‘clothing diet’ and paring a wardrobe down to only a few flavorless items has gotten our juices flowing. Trust us, we’re first in line for buying sensibly. Hello! What woman in her right mind would ever pay full price for a pair of Louboutin or Prada shoes? (Okay, maybe you do if you’re one of the billionaires Gates and Buffett strong-armed into giving away half their fortune to charity.)

While we’re all living on a smarter budget, this is not synonymous with a gal starving herself of fashionable clothing and accessories. Being fashionable is a privilege of living in a free society. It is an expression of individuality, curiosity, creativity and art. The question is, what does a lady really need and how does she get it without breaking the bank — or what’s left of it? That’s why we want to share our fashion philosophy:

We believe that fresh, sexy and serious are the building blocks of a modern closet. Whether you want to be the fresh-faced girl in blue blazer and khakis, the biker chick in leather jacket and motorcycle boots, or the power ranger in little black dress and black pumps, a good wardrobe allows you to play out all your fantasies.

Today’s woman knows that monogamy is dead — brand monogamy, that is. So shop around to get what you need. Invest in and hold on to hard pieces like suiting, outerwear and great jeans. Buy investment grade pieces on sale. Play around with soft pieces like underwear, workout clothes and tees. Head to discounters and mass retailers. And, have a little fun on the side with trendy seasonal looks and accessories — think Anthro, the street vendor guy at 71st and B’way, Etsy.

Finally, embrace the religion of the generation that fully understands the pleasures of going both ways: head to a consignment shop, buy and sell on e-bay, take it or leave it at the recycling center. After all, being a green goddess is one sure way to fashion heaven.

In our book, Bitches on a Budget, we lay out the essentials for every wardrobe:

• A great denim jacket.
• A leather motorcycle jacket.
• A navy blazer.
• An all-season trench.
• Blue jeans and black jeans with a perfect fit.
• Khaki trousers.
• Two white shirts: one button down, one ultra feminine.
• A white cashmere cardigan.
• A bright-colored cashmere cardigan.
• A little black dress.
• A sexy party dress.
• A black suit-skirt and trousers.
• Black high heels and flats.
• Metallic ballet flats.
• A great pair of black boots.
• Brown cowboy boots.
• A black hobo bag.
• A black clutch.
• A brown leather knapsack.
• Brown driving shoes.
• A set of X-rated lingerie.
• One hot chemise.


This story first appeared in The Huffington Post.






It’s About Timex
September 2nd, 2010 | Comments

It’s about time.

This morning we went to J Crew to return an impulse purchase from yesterday.  In fact, getting it together to make amends in such a timely manner and dispose of this mistake made us feel proud. We avoided the ‘meaning to return it’ predicament that can get a gal into trouble. You know the problem: you mean to get to the store and you mean to get to the store, but you’re always so busy that taking the time to go back just doesn’t happen. The shirt or shoes or scarf end up in the bag in the back of your closet. You feel shame when you eventually give the item away with tags still attached.

But we digress.

As we were waiting to make the return, we noticed a stack of really cute Timex watches.  True, we don’t need a new watch but we’ve been wanting a man-sized-round-faced watch with big easy to read numbers.

And, hey, we did deserve some reward for avoiding return FAIL. These were perfect and we assumed not too pricy. Hello, they were Timex. Then we turned the box over and saw the $150 dollar price tag. Even though the watch was pretty sweet, style-wise, there was NO WAY we could rationalize using our return-good-doobie-credit to buy it.

J Crew Timex

Still, we were excited and inspired. Of course, a Timex mens watch would be just the ticket to requite our watch-lust. We returned home, got to work and found these simple cool Timex watches for under $30 bucks on Amazon.

————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————–

P.S. Just in case you’re not in the market for a watch, as we were leaving J Crew, we spied this to-die- for velvet jacket in dark plum. (It looks even better in person.)  This time we did not make a hasty purchase and followed our own advice: search and lust, wait and purchase. Although, when it goes on sale we’re so in.

.