home design


Home Decorating and Horny
September 7th, 2010 | Comments


For those of you who have read ‘The Bitches’ you know we lust after bold, sexy, big…

Superordinate Antler Pendant

…chandeliers.

While we’re infatuated with enormous antler-inspired light fixtures, we can’t have them. They’re way too big for our space, too pricy for our budget and would require an entire home makeover to fit in.

Sooo…

…we went on the hunt for substitutes because we believe that little things, when used correctly, can still keep a girl satisfied. We’ve found an array of faux horny things sure to please:


While not illuminating this cardboard head is dear to us.


Cardboard Safari


This wall mounted coat hanger is a complete turn-on.

Ballard Designs, (one of our go to catalogs for good looking home accents), is selling a knockout collection by Susan Kasler.

Of course, a gal on a budget could brave the woods* and collect her own trophies.  After all, those big bucks freely shed their wares.

*(Just make sure the woods you pick allow you to legally collect shed antlers.)






Home Remedies to Get You out of Your Depression
July 20th, 2010 | Comments

We all need a little pick-me-up from time to time, whether it’s a new lipstick or a home refresher. Here’s a teaser from chapter 4  of Bitches on a Budget, all about updating your home on a shoestring. We’ll give you the lowdown on what to toss, how to re-purpose, where to buy, and when to splurge.

Home Remedies to Get You Out of Recession Depression

On linens:

Bitch, you spend more time in the bed and bath than anywhere else. Outside of your toothbrush, which objects gets more up close and personal? Do you need reminding of a few basic facts? OK, here goes. Things suck. Life is short, wars rage, money’s tight, jobs are sparse. These days, the only legitimate way to pamper yourself is with everyday objects—the things you use constantly. The things that know your skin and curves better than any man ever could…

On the Mid-Century Modern Craze:

Mid-century modern became hot by skipping a generation. No one wanted the old furniture from those 50’s ranch houses, so it was cheap, cheap, cheap. All the very cool hipster, creative types who couldn’t afford pricy antiques bought it because they could afford it…. Be a contrarian and think of the rush to modern as your opportunity to get back in touch (a little) with the frippery and finery of another era. A bitch is nothing if not in touch with her paradoxes…

On Mirrors:

Think Grandma’s place in Miami: the walls of mirror, the gold furnishings, the plastic cover on the sofa…. We can go without the plastic, but those mirrors? Love ‘em. They’re a perfect, simple, and cheap way to enhance any room. We’re not talking Poconos ceiling mirrors (although we like your thinking) but well-placed, space-enhancing, light-reflecting mirrors…

Bitches on a Budget is  published by the New American Library division of Penguin Books. Available at all major bookstores and Amazon.






Searching for Interior Space Ideas? Free Peeking
June 22nd, 2010 | 1 Comment

What woman in her heart of hearts isn’t a secret voyeur?

It’s nighttime. You’re strolling down the street, past rows of homes, curtained window after window. Tell us, are you not drawn to the one room not entirely hidden from sight? To that one apartment where the curtains aren’t sealed, where a stream of light leaks out, revealing a fractured glimpse of the home within? Do you not slow your pace, crane your neck, try oh-so-casually to catch a glimpse of the life beyond the window? Don’t you pause, half-hidden by the shrubbery, to sneak a look at the art on the walls, the rumpled sofa…  and, oh, is that Marimekko fabric on the side chair? What paint color is that amazing accent wall? And what on earth is that odd assemblage on top on the bookshelf? A collection of birds’ nests? Or just crumpled tissues?

People are fascinating. Their stuff is too. Other people’s collections and clutter and curiosities excite us. We love how a home reflects the spirit and soul of its inhabits— whether the inhabitants are aware of it or not.

Nope, we won’t lie: we love to spy.

But how? The homes in glossy magazines—so overstyled and trim and tidy—they don’t cut it. Fun, but they don’t send shivers. Too self-conscious. Design porn isn’t the real thing.

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